Why should we comment on adverts? Well, sometimes, people seem to follow this garbage. And after I see these dumb adverts, it seems behavior in Cluj is changing.
Yes, it seems some Clujians are following some of this terrible advice, given by computer generated people who shout at you for being polite. Cluj has changed in the past few weeks. It’s different than it has been for the past six years. After an advert aired where an Indian computer generated woman tells a middle aged white man that gentlemen don’t say, “You’re Welcome” I noticed that some people who used to be polite are no longer saying, “You’re Welcome.”
Other bad advice includes, “never introduce yourself by saying your name.” How stupid can you be. Of course you have a name, use it.
If anyone says, “never say,” they are usually wrong. There was a film, “American Tale,” where the mouse thought he’d never find his parents, and the French pigeon said, “never say never Feivel.” Okay, so there are instances where “never say” can be good advice, but when it comes to simple conversation…
“Never say you’re welcome” has to be some of the dumbest advice I’ve seen on the Internet. Being polite is normal, humans do that. “Never say ‘but,’ it invalidates what you just said,” is equally stupid.
If there is any word that you should never say, perhaps it is something like profanity, a swear word, or a racial slur. But nice words? Please, use them. Happy people are more likely to want to work with you.
I’m tempted to say, “Never say what the AI tells you.” But I haven’t heard it all, so they must get something right. I mean, in the age of analogue, we had a saying, “even a broken watch is right twice a day.” In other words, it’s difficult to be always wrong. (A clock that’s fifteen minutes fast can be always wrong, but even then, they used to have much smaller time zones, so it would have been right somewhere in the world.)
This is another reason to avoid social media. It seems to be so cheap to give terrible advice these days, and what for? To sell more terrible advice?
How should you act? For the most part, “Treat others as you would be treated.” I have heard philosophical arguments against this, what if you’re a masochist? Okay, treat people as they would be treated, as a normal, non-computer generated human would be treated. Treat people with respect, dignity, and common courtesy. You know, like your grandmother used to say, if your grandmother was a normal person.
Now, as to avoiding words like “um”, don’t worry too much about it. Practice makes perfect, like in a stage performance.
Find a book on etiquette, if you don’t know. Some things are slightly different in the USA, UK, Romania, France, and other countries. I saw a video that said in Korean, one version of “how are you” two days in a row can be unsettling. I know of no equivalent in English or Romanian. Here in Cluj, as in England, people prefer politeness. Grandmother knows better than any computer generated influencer, or any martial arts star does.
Start or end a conversation with small talk.
You don’t have to say, “You’re welcome,” you can say, “Și eu mulțumesc.”
“Ce Faci?” How are you. Or what are you doing?
“Mă numesc….” My name is … (Yes, I actually know someone called dot dot dot. Or at least one Dot.)
“Eu sunt….” I am…
“Mă bucar să te văd.” I’m happy to see you.
“Mă bucar.” I’m glad (after getting good news, or hearing someone is doing well, whenever.)
“Fără supărați…” Sorry to bother you. (Literally it means something like “not to annoy or anger you,” or perhaps, “don’t get mad,” but in a real sense it’s an equivalent of, “sorry to bother you.”)
Use those phrases in the front of the language book. Even if you use an archaic phrase, it’s part of being civilized. Don’t be a digital Tarzan. (But remember, even Tarzan has enough courtesy to tell you his name.)
Now, I’ve seen many people still using these friendly greeting, and, “mă bucar.” It is always nice to see people greet each other with kindness.
Some seem to be sad and tired because of the economy or whatever, and I can understand that. I hope that none of the people who have ommitted the greetings, however, are doing so due to bad advice they find online.